“DONT BOTHER COMING HOME”
“GONNA SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE.”
"I ACCIDENTALLY HAD SEX WITH IT."
"NOW WE’RE IN LOVE"
I will never not love dog texts.
Fun fact: If you read the dog’s voice in your head as Mantzoukas, it gets even funnier.
Young People: if you ever hear someone say that they are going to “take him/her behind the woodshed” in the future and you don’t understand what that phrase means, just remember this Superbowl game to understand what that phrase means when used in context:
The Seahawks took the Broncos behind the woodshed in the Superbowl.
TIL: Scrappy-Doo is a Dobihuahua.
Here is a recap of the Kearse touchdown: Whiff. Whiff. Whiff. Whiff. Whiff. Touchdown.
The Broncos are really sucking. Where is Bobby Boucher when you need him?
and finally, I can explain everything going on in this game - The Seahawks clearly switched all the Sativa in the Broncos secret stash for Indica
Now THAT’S how to do a SuperBowl 1/2 time show.
I think this young lad is going places… and the old guys don’t suck either!
Today: Taught myself and mastered how to create pivot tables in SQL. Tomorrow: World Domination.
When Ken Morrish picked this apple off a tree in his garden, he thought a prankster had painted half of it red.
But after inspecting it closely he realised that the remarkable split colours on the fruit were a natural phenomenon. And the bizarre apple turned Mr Morrish into something of a celebrity in his village with scores of neighbours queuing up to take a photograph of it.
Experts say that the odds of finding an apple with such a perfect line between the green and the red are more than 1million to one. [source]
My Biology major boyfriend got a scholarship for excellence in Botany as well as a scholarship for excellence in Biology and Zoology
I asked him if this his possible and all he said was “I don’t know, plants are fucking weird”